Love and Math

Everyone knows that 1+1=2. Everyone has heard the phrase 2 hearts joined as 1. I have even heard when true love hits, 2+2=5, meaning that something extra is thrown into the package when it's really real. People have a way of putting love, the unexplainable, into terms that are concrete and unchanging, such as numbers. People are added together and eventually multiply to make families. This is what I mean when I talk about love and math.

It's easy to talk about love and math when speaking in terms of addition and multiplication. 1+1=2. Half and half equals a whole. It's all about coming together and creating something new, adding something into the equation that wasn't there before, and the situation becomes better for it. That's what love is.
But what happens when you work in reverse? What happens when you subtract or divide? What happens when love dissipates, or there are breakups or obstacles? In math it's tricky, and in life it's harder. There are remainders and decimals and fractions floating around.

When two people fall in love, it can be considered 1+1=2. But I'm moving to Nashville in two weeks. We aren't breaking up, we're going to suffer the long distance thing, work it out, we're even getting married next year. It's definitely an obstacle. I am still my 1 person, but I feel like I'm less myself without him. How many ways can you divide 2? Am I only 3/4 of me? Does that mean he's the 1 1/4? Or is that extra little piece of me just floating out there somewhere, waiting to be reunited? Maybe it's more of a case of 2+2=5, and we are just losing that extra 1 when the distance tears us apart? Except we aren't. We are just as much in love as we are every day, and it's me personally that feels like I'm losing a part of myself, not a part of love.

This is where my math metaphor falls apart. Love and math is fine and dandy as an addition, joining two people together makes for sweet poetry, but when they reach a hurdle or division, where does the split occur? True love joins people so completely that unlike numbers, they cannot be divided. It becomes impossible to distinguish the self from the other without losing a piece of the puzzle.

Took Long Enough

We set a date. I know not too long ago I was complaining and bitching and moaning about how jealous and resentful I was about people who are getting married all around me when I was first to get engaged... well, I did something about it. Shawn and I had a discussion and we decided that next year really is the best time to get married. We don't want to wait until after grad school. We don't want to wait until after law school. We definitely don't want to postpone into my PhD days. Next year is the time, and June 30th is the date (assuming we can find a venue that works for us, we may have to be a little flexible, but for now, it's June 30th).

So mark your calendars, after 6 years of dating, after almost 4 years of being engaged, the most indecisive couple in the world is finally tying the knot. June 30th, 2012 :)

The Good Thing about Small Towns

About a month ago, Ezra Thompson decided he was going to go out west on a hiking expedition in the mountains of Washington state. He has been really into the whole outdoorsy thing lately- rock climbing and snowshoeing and whatnot. He had professional equipment and all that jazz. Nonetheless, he managed to get himself stuck on a cliff for 4 days and stranded; he had to be rescued by a helicopter team when he didn't show up to the summer camp he was supposed to be working at. He was missing for a full day before they found him and another day before they could get to him because of treacherous avalanche conditions. Luckily, he's fine. Probably a bit scared and who knows when the next time he'll go on a mountainous trek will be, but he's fine.

He was supposed to arrive at camp Tuesday. He was called in missing Wednesday. They found him Thursday. And I think they rescued him either Friday or Saturday. My point is that all of this is happening halfway across the country. Shawn and I, 2 mere aquaintences of Ezra living 2 hours from our hometown, knew about it by Wednesday evening. Incidently (and unfortunately), we were the ones to inform Peder. (Why Jay and Laura didn't call their elder son is beyond me, by the time we found out, all of Paynesville School System knew about it as well as the majority of the area churches, so why no one bothered to call Peder I still don't know). When a person goes missing or is in need of assistance, a small town pulls together. Churches whip out their prayer lists, schools do the same (F*#$ the first amendment, a life is at stake, let's pray!), and by Thursday morning at the very latest, everyone in the Stearns, Kandiyohi, and Meeker area was on Ezra Thompson's side. And by that time, even his brother in Nebraska had been informed :)

People who have probably never talked to Ezra left him public facebook messages, wishing well. His rescue went smoothly, and now that all is back to normal, he can continue being the shy and quiet guy that had his few days of WOW, WAIT, WHAT?!
My point is, you can't get that in a big town, or a small city. You can't get that in a community where people don't know each other. And for one of the first times in the last 3 years, I caught of glimpse of what it might have been like when everyone was worried about me in 2008. It makes me grateful for where I came from, and I hope that it continues to be that way for future Paynesvillites who find themselves between a rock and a hard place- in Ezra's case, literally.